My mother's meltdown, or how she realized she had waterfront property...

So there's a certain quality you relinquish when you live with your elderly parents. It's called your sanity. My husband, who loves to tinker but in the process makes things virtually unusable, has rigged our garden hose to go off automatically at 3 a.m. without any human intervention. That is unless you count mopping for three hours after waking up to your entire kitchen filled with 2 inches of water a human intervention. Now, I wish I had filmed my mother when she discovered it, because I would submit it for Oscar consideration. The wailing she displayed would put Meryl Streep to shame. The one thing I will have my husband do now is attach the hose to a wine barrel so the next time it happens, we can drink it straight off the kitchen floor. That might be an actual invention you could make money from...